Wednesday, July 05, 2006

All Things Marvel At Heroes Con: Snark Edition

Happy 4th, every one, and hope you had a happy and safe weekend! That said, I saw that apparently there was a convention over the weekend, and so as is 2GBC custom, I'm going to take sound bites out of context from Newsarama's coverage and use them to poke fun at Marvel.

"Winter Soldier will be returning, Quesada said when asked about the character, and suggested that he may be making an appearance in some Civil War related stories."

Winter Soldier? Returning? And in Civil War stories! NO! Shocked! Shocked I am, to find gambling in this establishment!

"Quesada said that while he can’t wait for Spider-Man 3, he’s very excited about Jon Favreau’s take on Iron Man, noting how enthusiastic the director is for the film, and how he’s looking to work with fans on it."

Does anyone else think that Favreau's going just a tad overboard with fan involvement, what with the MySpace, the message boards for suggestions and all that? I mean, I'm all for fan involvement, but stick to your vision, Jon! Beware of drooling fanboys like myself! And what's the over/under on how many days until he posts the "Win A Part In The Iron Man Movie" contest?

(And yes, of course I'd totally enter that contest. Character Fandom Hypocrisy knows no bounds.)

"Quesada said that it’s too early to name particulars, but there are many changes coming for the Avengers. “I can guarantee that you’ll love it…or hate it,” Quesada said."

Well, anything would be a nice change from apathy, I guess.

"Reed tells Peter about his uncle, who was a writer and creator, and was caught up in a McCarthy-esque witch hunt, and as a result, was jailed and saw his career destroyed. When Peter expresses his feelings of how horrible that must have been for Reed’s uncle, Mr. Fantastic says it was, but the law is the law is the law, and his uncle was wrong for not cooperating with the government"

Someone on the Newsarama board already beat me to it, but I'll repeat it here: Reed Richards, Asshole! And isn't Reed's conclusion the exact opposite of what it should be given the story above?

"Asked if Spider-Man’s webbing was organic (as a fan noted the scene in Amazing Spider-Man #533 when an un-costumed Peter Parker webbed a gunman’s hand) both Quesada and Straczynski said that it’s been organic for a while now with the character."


"Straczynski noted that at least one hero will quit the country, and take up residence in Paris."

Because France loves them some immigrants! Seriously, I'm not sure who this is, but how many kinds of awesome would it be if it was Captain America? Answer: 762 kinds.

"Jenkins said that he has many, many more Sentry stories to tell, and as far as he’s concerned, the sky is the limit with the character. It’s up to Quesada and Publisher Dan Buckley as far as how much they want him to do, Jenkins said, but he has stories that would put the Sentry squarely at the center of the Marvel Universe."

Paul, on behalf of the six of us who still love the Marvel Universe: write down those Sentry stories. All of them. Then wrap them up, pack them in a box, then weigh it down with lead, slather the box in chum, and drop it from an airplane into the South Pacific. And we'll forget this whole Sentry character ever existed. OK? OK.

"Look to the pages of Wolverine for Namor’s reaction to Namorita’s death in Civil War #1."

Naturally! Wolverine is always the first place I check for news on Namor! Stupid Marvel.

"There are no follow-up plans for Magneto after his recent appearance in New Avengers, although, Quesada said, if he was going to show up, the X-books would be the safest place to look for him."

Of course, your definition of 'safe' may vary.

"As for the uncensored, MAX version of Frank Cho’s Shanna, the She Devil, Quesada said that he’s fairly certain it’s being done, but is unsure of when it will be released."

Aw, hey Joe, we understand. It's not like you're the Editor-in-Chief or anything, and should know whether certain projects are...oh, wait. You are. Ye Gods! "Fairly certain"?

DC observations later!


Anonymous Anonymous said...

*Ugh* I could not be more disgusted with Richards'/Quesada's attitude toward the whole Civil War mess. Why the hell is everybody acting so out of character? I mean, is that right to privacy such an ambiguous issue? Oh, wait...

3:18 PM  
Blogger markus said...

You do realise getting you to talk about it, even in mockery, is part of the point, right?

For myself, I've decided Quesada's public personality is an obnoxious git and the prime example of an attention whore who will lie about whatever pleases him if it suits his ends. Ignoring him (and newsarama) not only does wonders for my blood pressure it has also decidedly lessened the urge to "stay informed" about current events in the big two superpeople universes.

3:33 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Actually considering Wolverine's tracking down Nitro, the man who killed Namorita, thats EXACTLY where I'd expect Namor to show up.

You know cause Namor would probably be doing that to.

6:58 PM  
Blogger redlib said...

hee hee 'the six of us that still love the Marvel universe'.

In this Civil War, Spidey needs and Emancipation Proclamation from Tony Stark, Tom Breevort and Quesada are Stonewall Jackson and Lee at Antietam!

7:29 PM  
Blogger Chris said...

Anon: I'll have to see how it plays out in the comic, but I agree - this just seems like a silly-as-hell piece of "evidence" to justify Reed taking the gubmint position.

Markus - Ah, but see this way I can mock from afar and still not but the FF tie-in!

Mallet: I see your point. Of course, not having succumbed to the Wolverine tie-in, I didn't know that. On the other hand I'd also argue that this was a perfect opportunity for a Namor one-shot dealing specifically with this.

Redlib: Sadly, some of us will always be Marvel slaves. :-)

8:27 PM  
Anonymous carla said...

Of course, your definition of 'safe' may vary.

"Hey, Magneto! Sorry about that New Avengers crap. We really din't even think to find you there and I don't think the Avengers really did either. Here, come hang out with the X-Men again, we're really not doing much. Ignore the giant robots, everyone else pretty much does and come hang out with the handful of teenagers we have left. Oh, some of us have gone to space, so there's plenty of room.
Xavier? Oh. He's not here. Scott doesn't want him here anymore. "

He honestly might do the books some good. Or at least have a new place to mope about in his jammies.

10:38 PM  
Blogger joncormier said...

Yeah I'm really hoping Vince Vaughn gets cast as Tony. He already has that "recovering alcoholic" look down pat. That, and the TARDIS briefcase Tony uses to carry around the armour need to be in the flick.

5:28 AM  
Blogger plok said...

That so cracks me up about the goddamn Sentry! AS IF! As if the sky's the limit, centre of the Marvel Universe, many many more stories to tell...!

10:24 PM  

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