Tuesday, March 07, 2006

DC Makes My Head Hurt

OK, so I need some help here. (Shaddup!)

I was looking over at the DC OYL lineup over at IGN, and thinking about which titles have me legitimately interested, which ones don't, and which ones I'm baffled about. We're going to talk about the ones that baffle me, in hopes that you, comicsblogoweb brothers and sisters, can enlighten me.

1. Blood of the Demon - Is anyone buying this? I could have sworn it had been canceled. Does Etrigan still talk in those blasted rhymes? Is DC's not-cancelling of the book just an elaborate practical joke on John Byrne? Is there some Byzantine copyright law that states Byrne gets to take back all his retcons ever if someone doesn't give him an ongoing at all times? Precisely who the hell is reading this? And why? I'm asking because I want to know; the snark was just a bonus.

(Whoa! Dr. Doom moment there, with the 'blasted rhymes' thing. Next thing you know I'll be referring to the 'accursed Richards!')

2. Blue Beetle - I'm torn on this one. On the one hand, it seems like DC interpreted the fan outcry at blowing Ted Kord's brains out as, "Hey! We goofed! You guys love Blue Beetle, so we're bringing him back!", only they didn't realize that people actually liked Ted Kord more than the name itself. On the other hand, I applaud them for at least attempting to create new characters, even if they do give them stupid, George Lucas-esque costumes. I'm thinking that in the interests of supporting new launches I should give the first issue a shot. Thoughts?

3. Outsiders - I have never, ever, understood the purpose of this comic. I have never read an issue, either, so I'm freely asking for advice on this one. It seems to be the superteam equivalent of Jell-O that was taken out of the fridge way too early. Is this supposed to be a younger, edgier JLA? An older, wiser Teen Titans? A morally superior Suicide Squad? A more readily marketable Doom Patrol? I have no idea. All I know is that Nightwing is consistently featured on the cover, which immediately provokes the reaction, "Hey, are there any Batman comics out this week?"

4. Supergirl/Supergirl and the Legion of Superheroes - I am forever at a loss to explain why so many people find Supergirl fascinating, when to me it seems like a blatant gender-pandering Superman knockoff. Is it the powers? Is it the impossible-to-decipher backstory? And why does this cover make her look like a hooker at a truck stop? Is Supergirl really that popular that she can star in two titles? Eeesh. I just don't get it. And LOSH is one of those titles that I just can't compel myself to pick up, but I don't know why. Opinions on the comicsblogoweb are all over the map on this one, but I'm certainly willing to entertain advice on why this might be worth reading.

5. Crisis Aftermath: Bludhaven - Listen, I'm a huge fan of Palmiotti and Gray, but I've never been able to muster up any interest at all in Bludhaven, its denizens, or its protectors. The name "Bludhaven" is just too damn goofy, and it sounds like the name of a high school Metallica cover band. And it's a bi-monthly six issue series? Which means that it'll take a year to finish, and by that time we'll be smack dab in the middle of all the OYL stuff, and I don't even want to THINK about how it aligns with 52, and...you know what, my head hurts from too much math. I'll make the decision at game time, because I really do like the writing team.

6. Ion - Ion. Ion, Ion, Ion. Ion. Ron Marz. Ion. Kyle Rayner. Ron Marz. Ion. Goofy costume, with a green hockey mask and a door knocker for a chest emblem. Ion. Ron Marz. Kyle Rayner. This is the comic equivalent of holding a 16 in blackjack while staring at the dealer's King. Jeez, I just don't know. Crap. Help me out here! I may just hold out for Ragnell's review. I would have much preferred that they kept Kyle around to help out in the new Green Lantern Corps ongoing, but hey; the fact that we're even getting a GLC ongoing is enough of a gift horse that I don't need to give DC dental opinions.

Help me out!


Blogger Spencer Carnage said...

Outsiders is DC trying to make Marvel comics. In fact, everything Winnick does, he learned from Marvel. I'm almost tempted to ask Scipio to explain the existence of the outsiders but he hates me, so...yeah.

Outsiders = Avenging Champ-o-Fantastic X-fending Vaders with Dick Grayson all growed up.

4:11 PM  
Anonymous Larry McQuaide said...

#1 - No Idea. Never Read it.
#2 - I like the new look.
#3 - Can be either OK or very, very bad.
#4 - No Idea. Never Read it.
#5 - Bi-Weekly not Bi-Mothly
#6 - I'll give marz and Kyle a chance, but it looks goofy.

4:30 PM  
Blogger Randy said...

#1: I SOOOO want to get this book. Only because Chris gets Marvel Team Up. So I need to pick up Blood of the Demon. You stop getting that silly nonsense, so will I. Hmm...maybe ASSBAR...
#2: Didn't even care for Ted Kord, so I won't care for this one. Unless he teams up with Booster Gold and opens an island resort.
#3: Didn't it used to be Batman & the Outsiders? That would stir people to buy it. Otherwise, snooze.
#4: I'm not going there, though LOSH does nothing for me. But I did try way back, but just couldn't get over the hump w/ Legion Worlds, Legion Lost and the restart awhile back. I just didn't get the toons.
#5: I had to ask what Bludhaven was one day. "Nuff said.
#6: All yours buddy.

You go with your bad self. "snap, snap"

4:46 PM  
Anonymous fin fang doom said...

1) I don't.
2) It's been a while since DC did one of these "use an existing name to make a new hero" things. If Keith Giffen's involved it's at least worth taking a look at it.
3) Outsiders is a team of the heroes that are willing to do the jobs the big guns aren't. I swear that's not DC's line. I read a handful of issues pre-OYL, plus the last issue, and it seems as though the Outsiders are more of a proactive team that finds and stops the villains before they do the really bad stuff.
4) Doesn't Supergirl sell insanely well? I've liked the character since a friend guessed she was evil (strangely, for a completely different reason than why she was actually evil). I can't imagine Supergirl will take over the book even though her name's on the cover.
5) I'm sorta wondering why Nightwing seems to have given up on this town he supposed loved like Batman loves Gotham. It made sense when I was assuming he'd die, but now that he's alive OYL I'm perplexed.
6) Probably just a matter of there being too many Green Lanterns. They've already forced Guy off of Earth and with JLU off the air they'll forget about John Stewart again.

4:59 PM  
Blogger CalvinPitt said...

I'm a Kyle Rayner fan, so I'll probably at least give Ion a chance.

What I can't figure is this: I was pretty sure that Blue Beetle scarab was a mystical doohickey. So why is it being treated like some Iron Man/Venom symbiote-thing?

5:05 PM  
Anonymous fin fang doom said...

This magical doohickey just happens to give you a suit of armor, I guess.

5:37 PM  
Blogger Chris said...

Bludhaven is bi-weekly? That's quite the typo from IGN's site, then.

Which goes to prove a longstanding theory of mine, which is that IGN is run by six crippled monkeys given regular testosterone injections.

6:04 PM  
Blogger Mallet said...

#1: I SOOOO want to get this book. Only because Chris gets Marvel Team Up. So I need to pick up Blood of the Demon. You stop getting that silly nonsense, so will I. Hmm...maybe ASSBAR..."

Marvel Team up is great!

11:46 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Why get Supergirl and the LOSH? Two words: Kitson. Waid.

nuff said.

12:31 PM  
Anonymous Nick Nameless said...

1. Never read the book, but that's a damn good cover.

2. I can't help but feel that DC is gonna wish they killed Booster Gold, instead.

3. I can't even fake interest in this series, especially with Winnick at the helm.

4. Legion fans are weirdos.

5. How can anyone hate on a city obviously settled by the ancestors of Major Bludd?

6. That costume is so bad it's preventing me from picking this up. It's the truth.

2:09 PM  

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