Thursday, July 27, 2006

Cautiously Optimistic

OK, so I haven't gotten my comics this week (Batman, Captain America, and Godland), and there's been precious little time to update our little blog, and I didn't even do a San Diego: Snark Edition, thanks to the lack of actual news and excitement around Comic-Con.

Instead, I'll talk about the Iron Man movie, and how against my better judgment I'm getting excited about it. Come on, how many times do I get to talk about Iron Man? Three, maybe four hundred? Sheesh.

I'll be honest, part of this comes from the fact that growing up I was absolutely convinced there would never be a shot in hell of me seeing Iron Man on a big screen. Not when Marvel was content to license crap like this, this, or this. So a great deal of my enthusiasm is due to the fact that my most favorite hero is finally getting a shot at the silver screen.

(Side note: And part of me really, really wants to say, "See? I TOLD you he was cool! I told you, you bastards! MWA HA HA HA HA!)

(Additional Side Note: Of course, the people I say this to will probably point out that in the comics Iron Man is a complete assmunch right now, so... thanks a lot, Marvel.)

Anyhoo, here's why I'm optimistic:

1) The villain is the Mandarin. Outdated bigoted caricature, or mysterious Chinese madman wielding alien jewelry? YOU make the call! I'm all for this, since Mandy is one of my most favorite old-school Marvel villains (for obvious reasons).

Plus, it's not like Ol' Shellhead has the most well-known rogues' gallery. There are some real stinkers in there (I'm lookin' at you, Unicorn). Start with Mandy and then move on to Whiplash, the Melter (just guess what HIS superpower is), Titanium Man or Crimson Dynamo.

(See? I'd be surprised if more than twelve readers recognized any of those names.)

2) While the design hasn't been finalized, check the poster here.

That's right, the return of the circular Uni-beam on the chest. Adi Granov, thank you. It's little touches like this that make me think we're on the right track here.

3) They're starting off in the bulky gray Whirlpool refrigerator armor, telling the origin, then whipping out the red-and-gold weapons platform in the third act. This is brilliant. Hopefully they spend a decent amount of time on the origin, since it's key to understanding why Tony builds the IM suit and decides to become a superhero.

4) It's going to have a Tom Clancy/James Bond-ish "feel". I'm not quite sure what that means yet, but I'd like to think that it hearkens back to the days when Tone would be attending a conference in Switzerland, making backroom deals and dinner dates by day and whipping out the armor and punching bad guys in his off hours.

5) Two words: suitcase armor. No, it hasn't been said officially yet, but if I could just hear from somewhere that there will in fact be the Suitcase Of Multiple Dimensions that contains his armor folded up neatly alongside his socks, I will pre-order tickets right damn now.

6) They're not starting off with the whole alcoholism bit. God willing the first movie is good enough, the plan is to gradually introduce it in a logical way through two other films. Bravo. The last thing we need is Iron Man's screen debut to be a "message" movie about the Evils of The Demon Liquor.

(Sigh. It's OK to be optimistic occasionally, right?)

8 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

I hope they're making sure the producers and distributors never, ever see the War Machine armor.

Because if they see it, this will become a War Machine movie. That armor has a far higher 'splodo-quotient.

6:28 PM  
Blogger CalvinPitt said...

Hmm, up until your last point, I was getting ready to ask if the alcoholism was going to be involved.

I think you're right that it should be left for a later movie. The first movies are inevitably used to tell origins, get the hero into some action, and then have even more action against major baddie.

If they threw in a descent into booze, we'd be talking Lord of the Rings length here, no thank you.

I kind of wish they'd used the red and white armor. That was sooo much better.

Just kidding.

7:16 PM  
Blogger The Fortress Keeper said...

Be optimistic all you like. I myself had hopes for Catwoman when it was first announced ...

11:17 PM  
Anonymous carla said...

if I could just hear from somewhere that there will in fact be the Suitcase Of Multiple Dimensions that contains his armor folded up neatly alongside his socks, I will pre-order tickets right damn now.

I'm right behind you! Nervous, but right behind you!

though... I should see how Ghost Rider pans out befor ehanging my hopes on any Marvel movie other than Spider-Man 3.

1:20 AM  
Blogger MD said...

Plus, it's not like Ol' Shellhead has the most well-known rogues' gallery. There are some real stinkers in there (I'm lookin' at you, Unicorn). Start with Mandy and then move on to Whiplash, the Melter (just guess what HIS superpower is), Titanium Man or Crimson Dynamo.

(See? I'd be surprised if more than twelve readers recognized any of those names.)


I must be one of the twelve...

The Unicorn: the only supervillain dumb enough to mount a powerful energy weapon on his own forehead. Man, those were the days.

I think they have a shot of making this a decent movie. My only concern is that it seems like it should have been made a while ago, especially it's more of a sci-fi story rather than a tradtional cape-and-tights superhero movie.

2:00 AM  
Blogger joncormier said...

I'll second the desire for the TARDIS like briefcase. Because technically it could hold a bigger briefcase inside and that just makes people's minds bend.

11:13 AM  
Blogger kelvingreen said...

Yeah, I know some of those guys (mainly the anti-Iron-Men at the end of the list). I don't know the Unicorn, but I do remember Ultimate Unicorn, a Japanese horror movie type guy with a bit of the Vision growing out of his head. Seriously. Ultimate Nightmare for more.

6:57 AM  
Blogger inkdestroyedmybrush said...

yes, those of us long suffering Iron man fans can clearly see that the rogues gallery is not what it should be (I'm looking at the guy with the tentacles that end in lobster claws on the cover of #32 or so), but the technoligy exists to make simply watchin ghte armor power up and kick ass look absolutely exquisite! I'm posting something on the Iron Man movie poster over at my blog as well: http://inkdestroyedmybrush.blogspot.com/

we iron man fans have to stick together.

11:59 PM  

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